Love Heals Gage

For the last few years every Sunday I get up and the first thing I do is read http://www.postsecret.com I always find a secret I can relate to, in some small way. This Sunday was the first time I saw a secret and thought, did I send in my secret? Holy crap, I could have made this post card! (I didn’t, I don’t have the time; but I could have.)

On this day last year I was blissfully ignorant. I didn’t know that in less then 24 hours we would begin the battle for Gages life. That in a little more then a week I would be watching doctors rush around, trying to keep him alive.  I watched nurses and surgeons race him down to sugery not knowing of he would come back alive or not.

I spent all day today remembering our last “normal” wondering of I knew what I know now would I have changed how we spent the day? I can honestly answer, no, I’d do everything the same way. We went to a BBQ at our friends house, Gage road on a longboard with daddy for the first time, played with our friends new puppy Peddles we had an amazing day.

It was an amazing day. It was a normal day. A last day before chemo, lumbar punctures, bone marrow aspirations, pills and blood transfusions. Those our our normal days now.

I also remember I complained about Gage waking up every two hours at night and how moody and whiney he has become in the last few weeks. He seemed to be crying for no reason, I could not figure it out what was wrong.

Little did I know, the waking up every two hours, the moodiness, the crying and most importantly the bruising I attributed to a clumsy toddler learning to walk were all signs pointing to acute lymphoblastic leukemia.

After dwelling on August 1, 2010 all day today I can honestly say, we had a perfect day and I would not have changed it for the world.

Happy Birthday Gagers! I love you so much and thank my lucky stars every day that you are here.

Gage had an appointment today to get his dressing changed. Nothing new there, it was the same as every Wednesday since December. Except this time I asked the Doc when Gage would be able to go places, other than his Grandparents house.  Because lets face it we are getting pretty flippin’ board at home.

Do you know what the Doc told me? That “other than day care, Gage can go anywhere he wants because his counts are on the up and up and he is healthy.” I was taken aback on hearing that.”but, but what about the germs?” I asked. Like all of a sudden because the Doc says it’s OK, I am going to start not freaking out when ever I take Gage places. Just the idea of taking him somewhere without a mask is making me feel panicky.

Like what if I take him to mecca ***Target***  and someone coughs or sneezes on him? Do you know how many people don’t cover their coughs and sneezes?! It is absolutely disgusting! Cover your face! Gage is one of the few oncology kids to not go to the hospital because he got sick. He was admitted to the hospital for just about everything else, just not for having the common cold or flu. Thank you baby jeebus and hand sanitizer wipes.

So now that Gage has gotten the go ahead, Grandma is going to take him out tomorrow during the day, when the stores are less crowded ***note to self: give Grandma hand sanitizing wipes.*** Then Granmmy and Papa are going to take him to the San Diego Safari Park this Sunday. Which makes me less anxious since he will be outside most of the day. I  am happy Gage will get to go out but super excited because the Hubs and I will have a day to spend with just each other. Something we have not done since Gage was diagnose last August. I am totally looking forward to this weekend.